20 1/2 Months...?

As I sit here, in front of the computer, typing this up, I begin to wonder about the day I leave for overseas. I've been planning about this for a very long time. I've just never took up the courage and actually take action, for once. I've set the date for 20 1/2 months to prepare myself for the move to Toronto, Canada, God willing. I guess you're wondering: what is he babbling about?

I'll tell you...

On January 28th, 2008, I've decided that enough was enough. I was sick and tired of hiding in my shell and not taking action for what I believed in. I've always had an interest in the Entertainment Industry. I loved it. I've always wanted to be a successful singer for all the right reasons. I just never took any action about it. But, I have. As I've pointed out in my 2nd blog:


Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Ti

It's what I really want to do.

I've realized something: if you want something real bad in life, you have to be prepared to fight and work extremely hard for it. No matter what we sacrifice in life, the results will be worth it. If we want to achieve something in life, no matter what it is, we just have to believe in ourself and have faith by doing it for all the right reasons. Sometimes, in order to get what we want, we have to leave the nest and spread our wings. We have to leave our old life behind and begin the new, but always staying true to what's important: yourself.

It's not going to be easy. It's going to take time. It's going to take strength and courage. It's going to take a lot of hard work and sacrifices to get to where we want in life. I've applied for 2 jobs so far, I'm just waiting for them to reply back. I'll be saving up as much as I can. Get as many shifts as possible and prepare to work my ass off like a whore on crack! I'll be applying for an American/Canadian VISA, thank god I have a clean record. Oh, I forgot, I'll be living in Toronto for a few months, until I get on my feet, and when everything is going according to plan, with me slowly getting somewhere, I'll be moving to Los Angeles, California.

I'll be practicing my singing, I'll try working on the techniques to improve, I'll try taking more lessons each day. I just need this to work. I have a good voice, I'm not amazing or horrible, I'm just good. I just need to work on my breathing/tone techniques. If I want this to happen, I've got to take action. Once my voice has improved, to the level that's satisfying, I'll record a few demos and open a music Myspace and a musician Youtube account. I won't leave Sydney, just yet. I'll give Australia a shot first. If nothing happens for me here, I'll move overseas.

I know, once I'm there, I'll need to find an apartment, I'll need to find a job. I need to work as much as I can, until I can get on my feet. I know it won't be easy. It's a whole new world out there. It will take time for me to adjust to it. I just need to have faith and be strong with this. It's what I really want. It's what I believe in. I know it won't be easy, but I just need to make this work. I need to make this happen. I need to turn this dream into reality.

I believe in God. I know that he will guide me to what's right. I know he will be there for me when I need him. I know that he will help me through this. I just need the strength and courage to work through this. I just need the support from all my family and friends. I don't care if no one supports me. I don't care if I just have a backpack and my ipod and all my savings to begin a new life overseas. Sacrifices need to be made in order to full-fill your dreams.

I never graduated from High School, because I left halfway through 2006. If I stayed at that school I would have not been here today. That's how bad it was for me there. I remember, while I was at school, I've always felt that I didn't belong. It never felt right for me. It wasn't what I was looking for in life. I'm not saying that everyone should leave school, education is very important to most of us. I just left because I had enough of all the crap and that I wanted to explore the world and figure out what I want in life. And now I have.

People have asked me, "why do you want to become a singer?", and here is my reason: I want to be the voice for those out there. I want to speak for them. I want to show them that there is more to life than ending it. I want them to follow their dreams, even when everything around you seems to fall apart, there's always hope. There's always a rainbow smiling through in the end. I want to show them no matter how much your heart is grieving and if you keep believing, the dream will come true.

I'm also going to fight for the person I'm deeply in love with. I'm not going to mention their name. But, I'm going to fight for that person. I just have to get them to notice me first. My feelings towards this person is different from the way the rest of the world views them. I don't care about their looks. I don't care about their body. I don't care about their status. I care about them for who they are and not what they are. I love that person so much. It's not lust. I know for sure it's not.

I just hope it's not too late. But, knowing what I know now: that person won't risk their career for a long time. I know that having this person in my life will make me the most happiest of all. I've realized why my previous relationships never worked out: because, someone out there was the one I was meant to be with. I just have to work and fight hard to be with them. It's like the story of Cinderella. She didn't sit around and wait for her Prince Charming. She went there to get him herself. She didn't need her Fairy Godmother's help. She just believed in herself and it came true. That's what I'm doing.

I don't really fall for people like this, but each time I look into their eyes I always see the saddness. And when they smile, their entire face lights up. I really do love this person so much. I consider them still human. They're just someone who turned their dream into a career. I admire them for it. I just hope soon enough that I will build a successful career as a singer. I might take up acting as well, never know. I really do believe in this. I really do want this. I just need the support of friends and family to help me through this. I just have to make it happen.

Sometimes in life, there's no time to lose. You got to catch your dreams, before they runaway. I just feel like running away, before I lose my mind. I just feel like leaving it all behind. I just need to set myself free and live my dream. I've realized that some people never take the time to try, but in reality: we all have to believe in ourselves and go for it. We have to remember, that the soul of life is just a song and everything goes on along. There's no right beat. We should never look back. We should just keep looking forward and catch and fulfill our dreams.

This comes to the conclusion. I'd like to thank you all for reading through this. I just hope you'll understand that this is what I truly want. It's what I believe in. I know I have to work extremely hard to get the career I want. I know I have to fight extremely hard to get this person to notice me and see how things go from there. I just have to make this happen. I just have to.

20 1/2 months to go...?


Jordan