Tuesday 29 April 2008

Damnit!

I'm getting sick again. I hate winter. It's really one of the worst seasons of the year. Thank god I don't live in a city that has snow. I'll be dead if I did.


Jordan

Sometimes

sometimes in life we wish for something we can't have.
sometimes in life that certain something is worth fighting for.
sometimes in life we can get that certain something.
sometimes in life that certain something will leave you wondering:
what could have been if you didn't fight for it.

Monday 28 April 2008

It's been a while

It's been a while since I've posted anything lately. It's been a crazy past few months but I keep moving forward. I've been caught with a virus for almost 3 weeks now. I haven't been able to go to lessons due to the fact I lost my voice from a terrible sore throat. I know that I'm falling behind on my vocal training; mind you a lot of things have been distracting me. Once I recover I'll be training and having more lessons to catch up.

It's been an interesting month for me. A lot of mixed emotions that I didn't want coming back. I don't like talking about myself... but I need to write down my thoughts. I've been feeling very melancholy these past few days. I barely see my friends anymore. I don't see my relatives anymore. It's just been real lonely. I know I have my friends online... but it's not the same for me. I just would like to have someone to be there for me... to hold me.

I know that singing is like weight-lifting: it takes time to build up your vocal cords. I just wish I could be ready to go out there and sing professionally. I just want to join my fellow birds and fly among them. I need to spread my wings and fly. I know it takes time. I know I have to be patient, but the time is killing me. I just feel like running away. I want to set myself free and be ready to live my dream. I just need to make it work.

Singing is my dream. It's my passion. It's my obsession. It's my life. I just hope it all works out for me. I pray to God every single night to help me. I know I have to do most of the work on my own; but I just need him to be with me to give me strength. I really do want this. It's all that's going for me right now. I know I have to work and fight hard for it. I'm prepared to do it. I just wish my vocals would be ready. I just have to work on my high/low notes and my pitch; other than that... my breathing technique has improved.

I know that the Entertainment Industry isn't easy... nothing in life is; but we got to keep the ball rolling. If we fall, we get up. We all have to face our darkest demons at some point, but an angel always shines through to us in the end. We just have to keep believing and having faith in our dreams. We should never give up hope... no matter how bad things get. As I always say: the soul of life is just a song and everything goes on along. There's no right beat. We can't go back again.

I guess it's one of those days, right?

As the saying goes...

"Great things come to those who wait."

I just hope that "wait" is worth it in the end.


Jordan

Wednesday 9 April 2008

Could this be a sign?

A dream is a dream. Sometimes they don't mean anything. Sometimes they tell us something that we need to know. It's quite confusing. I don't know if my dream is trying to tell me something or it doesn't mean anything. I base my life around the fairy tale of "Cinderella"; because of the message of the story: never give up on what you believe in; if you want something, you have to fight and work hard for it; just keep believing in your dreams and yourself.

Anyways, last night, I had a dream. I was in some garden and there was a girl crying. She couldn't see me, but I could see her. Suddenly, a woman appeared and pulled out a magic wand. I realized I was in the story of "Cinderella". After a while, the Stepmother appeared with a magic wand. The Fairy Godmother and the Stepmother were battling against each other.

Usually, the good side wins but this time the Stepmother won. The power from the Fairy Godmothers' wand was destroyed and Cinderella didn't have her "happy ever after". I know some people might call me stupid or odd... but could this be a sign that my dream of becoming a successful singer be an epic failure?

It's quite confusing to be honest. I'm not paying attention to it or that I'm worrying about it... but it's just a thought. I know singers/actors/dancers/models get rejected most of the time. It happens. The Entertainment Industry is a tough game. You got to play your cards right. You have to keep the ball rolling, no matter what happens, and keep moving forward.

As long as I have my family and friends to support and push me; then it's going to be worth the journey. I'm doing this for all the right reasons. I know staying true to yourself and being who you are will always make the person shine. Besides, as long as I have faith in Jesus Christ (always have and will) and have him in my life: it will make me the most thankful person alive.


Jordan

Monday 7 April 2008

One of those "days"

When you feel empty and numb inside.
When you feel like screaming... but nothing comes out.
When you need someone to be there for you... but there's no one.
When you want to be with the person you love... they are not there.
When you hide the pain from others and pretend nothing is wrong.
When you want to achieve and succed on your dream... it takes time .
When you wish and pray every night to build that dream... it takes time.
When you don't have any friends that share the same interests as you.
When you can't find anyone that has a passion for singing or acting.
When you replace your emotions with food to make you better.
When you feel so alone and trapped.
When you feel as though no one can understand you.
When you feel like crying... but nothing comes out.
When your chest hurts from the pain.
That's what I'm feeling right now...
I just wish I had someone to take me away.
I just wish I could be living my dream right now.
I just wish I had my wings to fly with the birds.
I just wish I was living my dream.
I just wish I was out there.
I just wish time hurried up.

I had the most WEIRDEST dream

I had a dream the other night. I was having a physical fight with someone (I didn't see their face) as the fight got intense,I was like: "beware the force is with me". Out of no where the Star Wars "theme" began to play and I pulled out a lightsaber and began fighting. I woke up, paused for a moment, then I LOL'D.

No wonder why my blog is called "Unique Blogs", because I have unique dreams HAH!


Jordan